Thursday, December 13, 2007

Brady's 2027 State of the Union Address; Football Picks

"Americans, friends, let's take a few moments to look back on the last three years since you voted me to the highest office in the land over Peyton Manning. As a nation we have defeated terrorism, disease and poverty. We have solved the health care problem -- boy was that one easy -- and balanced the national budget. Along with my Secretary of State, Bill Belichick, I have freed America from alliances with foreign nations that forced us into war in the past. Actually, within the next few weeks Vice-President Moss will finalize a deal with the nations of the world to solve all the issues in the Middle East, make cheap oil available to all the citizens of our world and end war for the next 1,000 years. On the domestic front, I want to thank every single one of you for voting positively on my "Bruschi Bill," which ended the so-called "Pussification" of this great country. Due to this landmark piece of legislation, people in this country can no longer act like infant children -- if you make a mistake, own up to it ... if you aren't good enough for something, you sit out ... if you lose, there is a reason other than an excuse. You get the point. Not since the days of the Great Depression and World War II has our country been so tough and so strong. If you'll briefly excuse me, I would like to make a quick remark on my son, John Edward Thomas. Young J.E.T. just led our Michigan Wolverines to the National Championship with a win in the playoff finals --thank god that Mr. Kraft stepped up to the plate and demanded that college football's champion be decided through a playoff. I'm honored my son led my alma mater to the first championship under the new system, I only wish Mr. Kraft were here to see it. In closing, I can say with all honesty that America today is the best nation in the world. It is similar to when I came to the Patriots in 2000 and we changed the nature of one of the worst franchises in all of sports. I remember after winning Super Bowl L in 2016, our sixth Super Bowl, thinking how We, the Patriots, could fix America. We have done it in the same manner we conquered the NFL, through a total team effort that leaves no room for weakness or excuses. As we move forward, and the 2028 election is getting closer, I will close with a remark that came to my mind the other day. When we played the old New York Jets -- you kids today know them as the London Bombers -- during our fourth Super Bowl season in 2007, there was a lot of talk of us running up the score because Eric Mangini had ratted out coac ... err, Secretary Belichick -- I can't believe I still slip up and call him coach -- and said we were cheating. Remember what our response was? We never made an excuse, romped through the NFL proving our greatness and won the Super Bowl. We weren't running up the score, we were just better and we let our actions speak for us. America, that is what our country has been doing since you elected me three years ago and that is how it will continue to run as long as I -- or when Matt Cassel replaces me in 2032 -- am your President. Thank you." As for the picks (All picks are against the spread)... HOUSTON (+3) over Denver SAN FRANCISCO (+10) over Cincinnati NEW ORLEANS (-4.5) over Arizona Atlanta (+15) over TAMPA BAY Baltimore (-4.5) over MIAMI (LOCK OF THE WEEK) CLEVELAND (-5) over Buffalo Green Bay (-10) over ST. LOUIS Jacksonville (+3.5) over PITTSBURGH PATRIOTS (-23) over NY Jets Seattle (-9) over CAROLINA KANSAS CITY (+4.5) over Tennessee Indianapolis (-11.5) over OAKLAND SAN DIEGO (-10) over Detroit DALLAS (-11.5) over Philadelphia NY GIANTS (-6) over Washington Chicago (+11) over MINNESOTA Last Week: 8-6 Season: 100-83-6 Lock of the Week: 8-6

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